Game Plan
Last month, I wrote about 3 steps we can take to build new habits and do things we really don’t feel like doing.
One of the steps was to create a game plan for when our willpower is low.
Anticipate, then set yourself up for following through with a plan.
But this ‘game plan’ can also be pretty handy for changing our thought patterns too. This is because 98% of how we feel, our reactions to life—are purely based on habits we’ve created.
I was feeling in a rut a couple weeks ago.
In the middle of dwelling on all the things I wasn’t feeling good about, I looked up and realized I had a choice to make.
I could continue down this path of feeling anxious and overwhelmed OR I could shift my focus and actually use the tools I know would get me out of this rut.
A little background...
In my 20s, I dealt with debilitating anxiousness on a daily basis. After years of this, on a random, vivid Sunday where I had a particularly awful bout, it occurred to me that I had a choice to either continue down this habitual path of continually being on the brink of an anxiety attack or I could chose a different path and force my mind to move in a different direction.
This moment of realizing that I am actually the one in the driver seat:—that everything I feel is a choice—was one of the biggest growth moments of my entire life.
...Wait, I'm in the driver seat? I can choose?
Oh, yeah, I remember this lesson.
I decided in the moment that I would start making a list of everything I’m grateful for.
Sounds simple.
Maybe even a little cliche.
But it worked.
Within about 15 minutes, my entire composure was different.
So this morning, I decided to write a game plan to help me move through changing thought and feeling patterns that are no longer welcome.
I’m sharing this hoping that it helps you as you move through tough times and unwanted thought patterns that hold you back.
The goal is not to avoid how you're feeling.
It’s actually the opposite - to feel what needs to be felt while not allowing the emotions to get stuck and therefore dictate your life.
Allow the uncomfortableness to arise and watch them move through you like clouds pass through the sky.
((Keep in mind, this is raw, journal-style to myself so… ))
I promise to myself that when I feel fearful, down, or like I’m focusing on the negative, I'm going to do the following:
When I feel fear/anxiousness:
Game Plan:
I will stop, look around, and realign myself to the moment right in front of me.
Suffering comes from not being present in the moment.
I’m going to think about the source of what is causing my anxiousness and then write out the worse case scenario of what could happen.
Realize that the fear in my head vs the actual threat is not reality. The actual threat is non-existent.
I choose to retrain my brain to not make small things 100x bigger in my head. This allows me to be more in the moment and less caught up in things that never come true.
"I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.” - Mark Twain
When I’m focusing on the negative:
Remember: whatever I’m focusing on is becoming bigger. This works for positive and negative things that I'm thinking about. My reality and who I am is literally made up of what I am thinking about.
Game Plan:
I’m going to make a list of 15 things that I’m grateful for.
If I can’t immediately make a list I will think of all the things I’m grateful for in my head.
When I feel overwhelmed:
Game Plan:
Write down all the possible things I feel like I need to do. Just brainstorm everything possible.
When I experience setbacks, self doubt, and/or ambivalence:
I’m striving for the best me in business, personal life, growth, and connection with others. I sometimes feel overwhelmed and like I'm not where I thought I would be at my age. When it rains it pours. The setbacks seem to happen not just in one area of life but several at the same time. These dips take a toll and, all these years later, I’m feeling fatigued.
Game Plan:
Write out 10 or more ‘dips’ or setbacks I’ve experienced and write the benefit I’ve gotten out of each setback.
So I encourage you to ask yourself:
"what is my game plan for when I don't want continue feeling [unworthiness, anxiousness, overwhelm, etc.]?"
